The sun, hissing my name, called me forth
My day of reckoning, brought alive by charred pavements
A sun-smog that told a certain half-truth
I, imbibed, embalmed, stepped into the world
And let it dictate my oblivious rest
A sleepwalk into myself, and him:
A smirk. ‘’Do you believe in
Your right to rule the world?
In self disclosure? In paradise?
Do you believe in hurting each other?
Do you believe it would feel good?
Is it the quenching of a celestial thirst,
Or is it an absence of God?’’
In the flashes of primordial truth
Glimpses of your inner composition
The material that strings you together and
Clumsily staples the frayed ends,
I saw a scared child. You had not slept
For twenty-four hours; I tagged along for coffee.
I had suddenly seen the sky, wide-eyed,
And wondered where I went wrong
As to be here with you, as opposed to feeling eternity
In some corner of the formless cosmos
In your careless caressing of my thigh,
I felt an enormity of nothing. A renunciation
Of a boundless expanse, the birth of a black hole
Within my chest. It was being nursed on the hate I devoured
I wanted to spit you out of my solar system and make a run for it…
It’s alright. I know how to lie, I know how to smile
I am a woman; I know how to make myself believe
That you are all I ever wanted