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The Birth of a Black Hole

The sun, hissing my name, called me forth

My day of reckoning, brought alive by charred pavements

A sun-smog that told a certain half-truth

I, imbibed, embalmed, stepped into the world

And let it dictate my oblivious rest

A sleepwalk into myself, and him:

A smirk. ‘’Do you believe in

Your right to rule the world?

In self disclosure? In paradise?

Do you believe in hurting each other?

Do you believe it would feel good?

Is it the quenching of a celestial thirst,

Or is it an absence of God?’’

In the flashes of primordial truth

Glimpses of your inner composition

The material that strings you together and

Clumsily staples the frayed ends,

I saw a scared child. You had not slept

For twenty-four hours; I tagged along for coffee.

I had suddenly seen the sky, wide-eyed,

And wondered where I went wrong

As to be here with you, as opposed to feeling eternity

In some corner of the formless cosmos

In your careless caressing of my thigh,

I felt an enormity of nothing. A renunciation

Of a boundless expanse, the birth of a black hole

Within my chest. It was being nursed on the hate I devoured

I wanted to spit you out of my solar system and make a run for it…

It’s alright. I know how to lie, I know how to smile

I am a woman; I know how to make myself believe

That you are all I ever wanted

It is that spectacular night sky that, shameless, spread before the eyes of the Lord, lures me to all the corners of the cosmos that I've yet to touch, bound by a sense of child-like innocence. It is

Carnage, carnage. My soul wants carnage. My mind wants bacchic excellence and my sacrilege demands a justification. What I desire, however, is my total condemnation. A form of arithmetic christening,

Innermost part of my veins Like an oppressive regime And Ceausescu's palace a mere analogy for my mind Empty halls and redundancy… No clear skies tonight. Darling, there are no clear skies tonight How

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